most difficult phase of life is not when no one understand you but when you dont understand yourself;)

May 7, 2012

I am so sorry


I am so sorry.I mean it. like really really mean it. I might look strong from outside but the truth i m broken inside.I need to shade my tears while writing this entry.Believe me its not that i dont want to answer your call.Its not that i dont want to reply your messages.But i dont have the courage to hear or read your message that full of symphatethic quotes.

Until the right time.when i had the courage to face it then i will be back.But from now on let this blog be the source of connection between us.Guys,I am so sorry. I know that i am selfish and its not about is about me.The girl that look strong but the truth she's nothing.I dont know who i should put the blame on.I need to point this to somebody.I really need it.So that the guilt inside me will be vanish away.But i dont have anyone.

The guilt.The guilt of not being a good daughter that my mom and dad can be proud of.Its not something that you could understand.i am shattered into piesces.And only time could heal it.I m tired of faking a happiness when i dont have it.I cant do this anymore.I am so sorry.

I have the ambition.I want to make my mom proud of me somehow.But when all of this happen..what can i do?I am no one.But i know that i am lucky enough to have you,you,you and you.Lucky enough to have a parents that tried so hard to hide their dissapointment from me.I am so sorry.

st4e.I didnt mean to neglected all of you.Because you are one of my source of happiness.Its not your fault.Sorry that i cant made it this twelve may..I am so sorry.

I am so sorry.

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